Selfishness makes us Heartless

Sitting outside on the crowded patio of my local Starbucks (which I hear is owned by Satan), reminds me of an elongated text message conversation I once had with my closest friend. We were contemplating three things: the irrelevance, the loneliness and the shallowness of coffee shop twalk and what a great and mindless sitcom could be made with all of the material we have gathered at our respective coffee shops. (Big ups to the Deitrichs in Laguna Beach and the SB on B&SM)

Irrelevance:
Personally, I am tired of being asked if I am an actress, if I want to be an actress, if what I am reading is a "good script" or if I would be willing to "model." I take all such inquiries (mostly from fat, old men whose gut juts out beyond the toes of their tiny shoes and whose three hairs fly wildly above the shiny crown of their fat head and glisteningly lazy-lip which is always on the verge of drooling) as an insult. Ya think women wear headphones while reading for a reason!?!?!?!?!? But, so goes living in LALA land.

loneliness:
I also hate over hearing "arena shop twalk" (that is a copy righted phrase, so hands off) going on around me as I intensely study advanced quantum physics. "Arena Shoppers" is what I call people who wish to enter the romantic 'arena' with the 'perfect person'..............................from match.com. They meet on the internet after having sifted through many other prospects and have decided to finally go out on a limb and meet with this one. Having previously only seen each others' severely touched up profile pictures, they ask questions that they think will save them the usual uncertainty of having to dedicate their precious time to actually meeting and dating someone they have met at a trustworthy, mutually-attended event or frequented establishment. First of all, NO!!! I am not Janet, Britney, Sharon, Samantha, Courtey, Elizabeth, Cheryl, Jennifer, Rebecca, Dee, Heidi, Martha, Mary, Shaniqua, TitiLala, Meredith, Shannon, Nicole, Lisa, Linda, Linda, Sheppy, Moetie, or anyone the hell else you are looking for...ha! YOU WISH! (* gosh! * ) Second of all, you sitting down with each other in your best dress and asking questions like "where do you see yourself in five years," "what are your top three goals for the next year," "are you a relationship person," "do you like ice cream," and "what is your favorite food/color/cheese/movie star/whatever" IS NOT GOING TO HELP YOU!!! And lastly, get a muzzle. You think that those sitting around you can't tell that you met on the internet? You did, we know it and we don't want to hear what you are saying because it drains us of the hope we once had, not in romance, but in the goodness of humanity!! So SHUT IT!

Shallowness:
THEN, there are the couples, business associates, groups of friends and study buddies who sum up their lives in "oh my god"s, "like totally, yeauh"s, "I mean, you know"s and "k"s. Although I have tried to eavesdrop enough to find some sort of context or subject matter...I still have not been able to pin it down. The conversation revolves around potential men/women/shoes/cars/sex/jobs/money. Are we always so self absorbed?

These being mine and my friends three beefs, I wonder if anyone in LA has relevant conversations that lack playful ambiguity and allow someone to really know them, their aspirations, their hopes and their larger picture longings. You know, I looked at the patchy, white, fluffy clouds above me about 20 minutes ago and they seemed so unchanging. I wondered, do we realize that we all live under the same beautifully decorated sky? We as humans, whether in the shallow LA or the impoverished Sub-Saharan Africa, share more in common than the things we try so hard to use to distinguish ourselves from others. The clouds, over 20 minutes are irreconcilably different. Such intricacies are built into the very world we live...and we have nnnnoooooo clue.

Everyone knows that my beef with the western world is its inability to value on an equal level, people from other cultures and seemingly different worlds. When it comes down to it, individuals are undeniably selfish, thinking only of themselves and that which affects their lives. I am no different. I worry constantly about what I need to do to get to where I want to be so that I can be happy in my ability to help others.

Those whose loved ones died in the recent Nigerian plane crash are not only thinking of themselves, but of the transient and painful nature of life. Those killed in the fire at a wedding in Pakistan hurt at the core of their existence; not about losing some adolescently tingly interest, but for ones who they have loved unconditionally from birth to incomprehensible death. All in all, Los Angeles will spend the week worrying about the gay male relationship portrayed in the multi-million dollar film, "Brokeback Mountain" while the rest of the under developed countries will spend their time wondering if they will be allowed the freedom and protection to vote without losing their lives, whether one of the people responsible for the wrongful deaths of thousands will be held rightfully accountable, and when the next time they will be able to pass a peaceful night will be.

Stop spending your energy on what shoes go with which outfit. Get a clue.